This blog was born in french during autumn 2003 and is now progressively being translated in your language.
New articles will therefore appear on a regular basis.
... my apologies to the people who hadn't understood this yet, all articles on this website are created and written by myself (his dad).
Lou is currently unable to do it,, just like he is to this day unable to grasp the concept of a "computer", "internet", or to focus for a long period of time on a conversation. Only time will tell us if we manage to integrate him completely in the world in which he lives.
Therefore all stories, despite relating actual facts, are obviously biased by my interpretation of his behavior. But having known him for over five years, I don't think I'm getting it wrong.
Thank you to the "Roi Baudoin" foundation ( "Parcours hors pistes" ). The new design, hosting and translations were partially made possible by their financial support.
Many thanks to Marco Pappalardo et Laetitia Bouet for the translation.
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sunday 30 january 2005
48. Virgule's blunders
Yesterday, in my bath, I started laughing uncontrollably. First I heard a "ploof", then mommy : "But ... Virgule ! What are you doing there ?". Then she laughed and she explained it to me : Virgule (our kitten who's in the silly age), had fallen, not in the bathtub (it had already happened the previous day), but in the toilet. I started laughing, so hard ! Me : "Virgule in the toilet ! Bah... Come on now, Virgule !"
One of Lou's monologues taped in the bathtub and transcribed word for word :
"Daddy ... ha, ha, ha ! The office,it was broken... Lou, he's broken. - blank - But no, Loulou, he isn't broken ! The office, it's broken. My office is broken... But if he doesn't have an office... huh... No, daddy, he's going to come down from the office. No, no, no, no, no - on a reassuring tone - ... huh ... Wait ! Wait ! ... But ... - blank - I'm tired of hearing you talk about the office... And the office, it's Granpa and Granma. - blank - That's with ... huh ... That's with little dog courage ... But it's later than that... And it's all alone ! ... And it's on sunday, even if you don't really want to at all. Marie-Anne says so (his school teacher)... You know how ... But you will see how I put this... But always... Always... Yes, you will see... will see... Come, let's go see what "kessinga" (-?-) is doing downstairs. - onomatopoeias - ... But, little dog courage ! It's also in the office... We should see in cold water, the office is stronger... It's evolving though... (incomprehensible moment - I'm mumbling) ... No ! I say : No ! But grandpa, I'm going to go get something to drink in the th... in the things... However it's going to last until the seaside... Then it will drive... (another incomprehensible moment) ... I'm going at grandpa's... until the flower fair ( = our neighborhood fair). For the works ...
(and it goes on like this for about ten minutes ).
Often, in the bath tub (or elsewhere ... meaning about half the time), I'm in my own bubble, like mom or dad would say. It's the exact opposite of my moments of "light" (see the article "emotions and light"). When that happens, I say a lot of things, I "spit out" every word I know, and in particular those who awoke some feelings in me. I'm sort of debriefing myself. For example, I hate it when daddy works at his home-office, because it means he's not available for me. That spawned crisis' for several weeks ! Nowadays, things are a little easier on that matter ( for daddy's sake who had trouble writing stories while hearing me cry downstairs ). Anyway... All this to show you, word for word, the kind of conversation I sometimes have with myself... (continued)
(a text received by email from Caroline) Nothing left to say ... about the reason for sharing this with you. (I would love to sign it, but it's not from me...)
The mother of a handicapped child says : "I am often asked to describe what it is like to have a handicapped child, so I can help people who don't know this unique experience to understand, to imagine what I would be like. So here ! Everything starts with the pregnancy and the desire to have a child. But expecting a child is a bit like organizing a fabulous trip - to Italy for example -. You buy lots of guides, you make beautiful projects : the coliseum, Micheal-Angelo's David, the gondolas in Venice. You learn a couple of sentences in Italian. This is all very exciting. After months of intense preparation, D-Day arrives. You pack your bags and leave. A few hours later, the plane lands. The pilot tells you : "Welcome to Holland!"
6 PM... Quite a busy day. Daddy left the house and forgot to tell me he was leaving. Fatigue and emotions fill my heartwhen the time comes to meet him back at home. My sorrow is unconsolable, my words confusing. The suddenly, a flash of "light" in my head. I carry on words and conversations with mommy and daddy : " Lou is crying (...) Loulou musn't cry. Loulou musn't curse or Marie-Anne gets mad "(his schoolteacher, see articles below). Mommy : "That's right dear, and Marie-Anne sure is right". (My sadness slowly fades away) Me : "Yes, I must obey Marie-Anne, Marie-Anne is nice. But she gets mad when I curse. So I can't curse. It's just like mommy and daddy when they get mad when Loulou doesn't behave. By the way (note from editor : precisely what he said!), I must play well with my little hands and Marie-Anne, otherwise I'll be a baby Cadum!" Daddy refrains himself from laughing : "That's right, because Marie-Anne has got lots of things to teach you." Me : "By the way (note from editor : and again), I musn't be afraid. I must trust Marie-Anne. I must learn well so I'm not afraid anymore". - blank - "Marie-Anne, mommy and daddy are here to protect me. That's why I musn't be afraid". (I'm all smiles now and I hug daddy) "I love you, my dear daddy!" Daddy : "I love you too, and that's why we help you not be afraid anymore. The more things you learn, the less afraid you will be". I end this by getting all sweet on mommy's and daddy's face. Back to positive. I vented my emotions... I'm all cute, all happy. Life is good, and I know fully well that Marie-Anne, daddy, and mommy love me a lot and that they do things for my own good.
On the way back from my walk with mommy, I found daddy out on the street, busy replacing the flat tire from mommy's car. I liked the screeching noise of the bolts coming off and I wanted to stay next to him. "Crac, goes the bolt!" - "Cling! goes the wrench that keeps falling". So I "helped" him in my own way. Then he let me feel the flat tire and the new one. I even tried lifting one. It's heavy ! Daddy also showed me that a tire rolls. Well yeah, to me, a car is basically just moving from point a to point b, some noise, movement, a back door (mine), a seat and the back of daddy's seat, and finally the body. Hence I only have a partial perception of what a car is. The same goes for many other things, which I discover little at a time. That's why sometimes, on the way back from school, when we arrive in the neighborhood, he takes me on his lap and I drive the car with him. I ab-so-lu-tely love holding the steering wheel with him. "Left ! Right !" And then there's the horn. But daddy doesn't let me use that too often.
There, the flat tire has been replaced. I feel just like the tire (it's nap time because I must have been partying too in my bed last night). And daddy too. Nighty night !
"A mesure que le temps passe, je mesure le temps qui passe (...) On s'embrassera dans le cou. Il y aura tout autour de nous." (Benjamin Biolay - les cerfs volants) (everybody is free to understand this the way they want)
Tales of a saturday morning unlike the others... Although. Mommy and daddy came home quite late (concert then restaurant with friends). But at 7:30am the rythm of the week takes over sleep. I babble and get restless in my bed. Eva comes to take care of me so mommy and daddy can sleep a little ... I'm lovely with my little sister, but at 8:15 ... I'm hungry. So my sister goes upstairs to get my mom (saturday is daddy's resting day). She gets up and joins me ... But I want my daddy. I don't know that yet, but at that very moment, my daddy hears me requesting him and thinks to himself he won't be able to sleep anymore. He thinks about Biolay's song. How about a family breakfast ? Croissants, fresh orange juice, coffee and hot chocolate for the girls. (this doesn't happen to us too often... seeing as how our schedules are so different during the week, and then since I always need to be taken care of when I'm eating, it's not easy being "together"). So daddy gets up (he's going to take a nap this afternoon ... because this evening, they are going over some friends', the fools !). When I hear daddy's footsteps in the stairway, I exult
Finally, my sister Eva is in a cast : a small sprain... More of a placebo than anything else(only for ten days), but hey... You'll have to wait until tomorrow to get news from me though because daddy just got home
from the hospital, and he's leaving again to go to a concert (Benjamin Biolay). Well yeah, he also deserves some time off (with mommy). (Crazy days follow and resemble each other). Later !
Besides the cat, yesterday was a crazy day for mommy and daddy (as they happen quite often). First, they had to get the cat vaccinated, reassure me because the day before I had used too many curse-words at school and my teacher (rightfully) got really mad. So I kept "debriefing" on the way home by constantly siding with daddy and mommy : " Loulou can't say curse-words, otherwise Marie-Anne gets mad " - " Now daddy " - (the classic gameof repetition where you have to remain zen with me while I repeat, re-repeat, and insist
that the person I'm talking to replies). It leaves little room and time for dialog and other members of the family ! And the cherry on the cake, Eva tripped in gym class and has a swollen foot. On top of it, thursday is the day of her psychotherapy (it was her choice and it's fine this way : so she can express herself about what she live about me). Then it was my turn to act like an idiot in the staircase and fall. Daddy still has to take Eva to have an x-ray made, and many more things to do...
I love sounds so much, that not too long ago, one of my "trips" was to go in the entrance hallway and stay there for a long time making the door to the living room squeak. I have to say daddy hadn't oiled it in a long time and it made beautiful sounds based on whether I moved it slowly or very fast. A real haunted house. It was great and I was having the time of my life : ME : "Door, you can't go "weeeeeeeeee" !" Then I would make the door squeak and get even more mad : "Door ! What did I just say ! You can't squeak !" or " You can't cry ! " (etc...).
The problem is even the neighbor would be woken up by the noise of the door when mommy and
daddy came home late on week-ends (they like partying and blowing off some steam on w-e). So mommy (that's right, mommy ! Congratulations daddy !) oiled the hinges of the door. Drama ! I got so mad... I was infinitely sad and I kept saying : "The door, it's crying because it doesn't squeak anymore!". And that lasted for two or three days ! So my parents found the trick and told me : "You see, the door, it's not crying anymore... It means it's happy ! It didn't like squeaking". They sure got me there ! Nevertheless, such an argument doesn't exactly help them making me understand that an armchair, a chair, a table (...) aren't alive the way us humans or animals are. But that's a whole other story.